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  • 4 Things We Wish We Knew About $ex Before We Were Married

     

     

    When it comes to Christians and newlywed sex, there are usually two extremes.

    For some couples, they head toward the altar with the expectation that they will find themselves soon lost in ecstasy and passion—a reward from God for staying pure until marriage. For others, the idea of $ex carries a lot of anxiety and fear—as he or she tries to figure out what messages of $ex are “real” between the portrayal we see in culture, the Church’s teaching, and one’s future spouse’s expectations. To add to this, the reality is that 80 percent of unmarried Christians ages 18 to 29 have already had—or are having—$ex, as reports indicate.

    As with most extremes, there is some truth to these for some couples. However, the majority tend to find themselves somewhere in the middle.

    This was the case for us personally as our first few times were a little awkward. Three days into our honeymoon we found ourselves in Barnes and Noble trying to find a book to help us figure things out in the bedroom. We’d read a number of Christian books about $ex prior to getting married, and they were very helpful in terms of the theological and relational aspect of $ex, but not so helpful on the supremely practical “how to” aspect—and more specifically, how to do it well and mutually enjoy it.
    Compatibility isn’t something that can be tested out in a trial run. Rather it’s something that you build together.

    Our honeymoon was eight years ago now, and you might say we’ve learned a lot since then. But looking back to the very beginning, here are four things we think every couple should known before their wedding night:

    1. Expect to be sexually incompatible at first.

    One of the common arguments used in favor of sleeping together outside of marriage is the importance of sexually compatibility. But in reality, compatibility isn’t something that can be tested out in a trial run. Rather it’s something that you build together through shared $exual experience.

    Just like anything you want to get good at, $ex takes practice. You don’t expect to just pick up a guitar for the first time and play Mumford & Sons covers, so why would you expect electrifying compatibility right off the bat?

    $exual incompatibility is a simple fact of every marriage when it first starts out (especially if you are both virgins), but all that really means is that you can now enjoy the process of learning with each other. That is the beauty a life-long commitment to marriage brings: lots of time to practice, practice, practice. And in this context, practice can actually be quite fun. The more you both learn about how your bodies’ work and what you both like, the better $ex will be for both of you.

    2. Take your time.

    Amidst the hormones and the excitement of your first time together, it is far better to go slow and take your time. For most women, it is normal for $ex to be a little painful and uncomfortable at first. And this, for some, can change the pace of honeymoon intimacy. As great as some marriage books and pre-marital counseling can be, this is one of the reasons it’s good to also consult a gynecologist before the wedding. And a word for men—go slow and be understanding.

    3. Your $ex life will have ups and downs just like anything else.

    For every couple, it is normal to have ups and downs in your sex life. You will have some stretches when $ex couldn't be better. You’ll have mutually satisfying, pure-fun $ex—and you’ll have it multiple times a day. Then you’ll have some stretches where the rest of life has left you fried, and keeping things going in the bedroom will take some work.

    Stress, work deadlines, housework, busy schedules, pregnancy, kids, financial issues, health issues and any other thing you can think of that is normal in life all affect our $ex drives. When you hit a down period, rather than taking this as a sign of a waning relationship, take it as a sign you need to be more intentional. You might even “schedule” $ex for a season. Very romantic. It might mean intentionally talking about what you both want or what you could try that is different or new. Or, in some cases it might mean seeing a counselor to work through some things that may be hindering things in the bedroom.

    Expect to have both high spells and dry spells. When you do hit a rough patch, please know that you are not broken or weird because of it. And know that if you commit to working through it together, good things will likely be right around the corner.

    4. $ex depicted in the movies leave some things out—including one very important thing we tend to overlook.

    When it comes to $ex in the movies, there are lots of things that the writers leave out when putting together their scripts. Like when your sweater gets stuck over your head, or shoe laces become an impossible puzzle. Or the ever-romantic moment when you have to stop to think about birth control. Or how about when one of you is ready to go while the other just isn’t quite feeling in the mood.

     

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  • The Case Against Sugar review – an unsweetened attack on diet myths

    A paper by researchers at Imperial College London and two universities in Brazil contends that artificially sweetened beverages, often called diet drinks, are just as big a problem as those containing sugar. There is no evidence they help people lose weight, they say, possibly because people assume they can eat more because their drinks are low in sugar.

     

    The report says the combined factors of what goes into artificially sweetened drinks, how they are consumed, and their environmental impact mean that “far from helping to solve the global obesity crisis [they are] a potential risk factor for highly prevalent chronic diseases”.

    Sugar-sweetened drinks, including sports beverages, have been identified as one of the major causes of obesity. Many countries, including Mexico and France, have introduced sugar taxes to try to reduce consumption, and the UK plans to do so next year.

    Many manufacturers are looking to boost sales of drinks containing artificial sweeteners in order to escape the levy. Such products already account for 25% of the global soft drinks market.

    Prof Christopher Millett, senior investigator at Imperial’s School of Public Health, said: “A common perception, which may be influenced by industry marketing, is that because ‘diet’ drinks have no sugar they must be healthier and aid weight loss when used as a substitute for full-sugar versions. However, we found no solid evidence to support this.”

    The paper, published in the journal PLoS Medicine, is a commentary on the research done so far into artificially sweetened beverages promoted as healthier alternatives and the impact on weight.

    It says the evidence does not suggest they help with weight loss, although they probably do not cause people to put on weight. Some studies show no weight loss; others show a small loss, but those studies were not always well done and were often funded by the soft drinks industry, the authors say.

    Maria Carolina Borges, the first author of the study, from the Federal University of Pelotas, in Brazil, said: “The lack of solid evidence on the health effects of ASBs [artificially sweetened beverages] and the potential influence of bias from industry-funded studies should be taken seriously when discussing whether ASBs are adequate alternatives to SSBs [sugar-sweetened beverages].”

    The paper argues that “given their negligible nutritional benefits and potential detrimental health impacts”, the environmental impact of manufacturing artificially sweetened drinks should be taken into account. It takes 150-300 litres of water to make one litre of drink, it says, and there is considerable solid waste and cumulative chemical pollution.

    Prof Carlos Monteiro, a co-author, from the University of São Paulo, said: “Taxes and regulation on SSBs and not ASBs will ultimately promote the consumption of diet drinks rather than plain water, the desirable source of hydration for everyone.”

    The British Soft Drinks Association dismissed the paper. Its director general, Gavin Partington, said: “Contrary to the claims made in this article, scientific research shows that low-calorie sweeteners, such as those found in diet drinks, help consumers manage their weight as part of a calorie-controlled diet.

    “At a time when we are trying to encourage people to reduce their overall calorie intake it is extremely unhelpful that products that contain no sugar, let alone calories, are demonised without evidence.”

    He added: “It’s worth bearing in mind that the UK soft drinks sector is the only category in which sugar is consistently falling year on year – over 17% since 2012.”

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  • 6 Sweet Ways to remind your Boyfriend of your love

    One is exhausted of hectic routines and daily work schedules that will probably reflect on our love relationships. Sometimes, we even forget the importance of each other and start living a boring life. In such a circumstance, we have to keep reminding each other of how much we love them. Next to this we are sharing six small gestures one can remind his boyfriend of her love for him.

     

    #1. Taking a walk down the memory lane
    he best way is to remind of your past memories and how it was being started. Love birds just remembering and talking about their spark of love for the first time is enough to flame the passion.

    #2. Cook Good food
    As an old proverb says, ‘’the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.’ Preparing and feeding your loved one’s favorite dishes can generally win his affection by showing him that you love and care for him.

    #3. Wear his favorite Clothes of his selection
    Gals what are you thinking what’s next I wanted to share? You can probably wear something of your guy’s choice. While going out, just try out his favorite dress that will probably show him his importance to you.

    #4. Give him little surprises
    You can gift him something, a small pen or a T-Shirt of a cricket player. A gift always sparks a person’s face with a big smile.

    #5. Spend time doing his favorite things
    Do his favorite things like playing his favorite games or watching cricket or football match or Reading books or just going to a club. This will surely make him win your heart as you are more concerned about going out and doing things his choices than yours. Ideally yes, he will feel very happy.

    #6. Love letters
    Those days are gone when people use to write letters expressing their love for each other. Today, a person is just a message away. So, keeping this fact in mind, and writing a letter to him in your own handwriting will show your efforts and willingness to go that extra mile.

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